having an affair | surviving infidelity | infidelity | relationship coach

Is Your Partner Having An Affair?
Get Help Surviving Infidelity

Having an Affair | Surviving Infidelity | Spouse Having an AffairSurviving infidelity is one of the worst experiences a human being can ever have. Discovering that your mate is having an affair is a crushing blow after which many have a hard time bouncing back.

Infidelity is being cheated on by your partner - the one person you hold in exclusivity with regard to your emotional and sexual intimacy.

Surviving infidelity once you've discovered that your mate is having an affair is difficult, as your relationship as a whole has been violated and compromised.

Everything you've held in trust... all of the feelings you've cherished... all of the love you've invested into your relationship - all of it is now tainted. Bridges are burned, dreams are shattered, and of course - hearts are broken too.

Surviving Infidelity Today

The world around us has become extremely liberated, with sexual expression leading the way. What was once immoral, wrong, and "crossing the line" has become more tolerated and even - in a strange kind of way - an accepted part of life, including infidelity. Even though sexual "free-for-alls" are the norm for many, oftentimes someone gets hurt - and then finds him or herself faced with the burden of surviving infidelity.

Is Cybersex the Same as Having an Affair?

In the past, what qualified as infidelity was simple - having sex with another individual. Today, the lines have become wider and the areas more grey. Liberation and modern technologies - for all of their good - have opened the door to 21st Century relationship problems and a modern "Pandora's Box." Surviving infidelity has become harder.

In today's world, each of us must decide for ourselves what infidelity means. Millions have had to adapt - learning that surviving infidelity can help bring peace in the wake of their heartbreak.

What is Cheating and
What Does it Include?

♦ Sexual Intercourse?

♦ Oral Sex, Petting/Touching?

♦ Kissing, Talking About It?

♦ Internet Cyber Sex?

Perhaps only the couple knows best what they consider cheating in their relationship. What would be "having an affair" for some may not be having an affair for others.

Having an Affair and Surviving Infidelity -
Where does the Cheating Begin?

Infidelity can be a stab wound for some, in which one's physical and spiritual heart is deeply violated. The essence of the marriage - love, trust, honor, commitment and dedication to the family - gets overturned completely. Viewed from this perspective, the chemistry, innocence, and wholesomeness of the marriage and family become tainted.

For the individual surviving infidelity, she or he is jabbed with a double-edged sword. Not only is the marriage and family compromised, but their integrity and self-esteem is often crushed too.

Married and Having an Affair -
The Trend is Now Increasing

Why is infidelity increasing these days and why are more spouses having an affair? There are many theories why those faced with surviving infidelity in their relationships continue having an affair. Media and technology have made cheating easier as individuals can now make contact online or through cell phones. It is easier than ever to lead a double life and cover it up.

With Modern Technology, it's Easy to
Find Someone and Start Having an Affair

Did you know that statistics show that as many as 35% of women cheat or have cheated on their spouses? Before blaming women, it is estimated that 7 in 10 men have acted outside of their marriages and relationships. Is it any wonder that more than one in every two marriages fail?

Having an Affair - Who are the Cheaters?

But infidelity doesn't discriminate. One's gender, socio-economic status, skin color or age doesn't pull them out of the mix. It seems those less likely to commit adultery are those committed to strong, religiously-grounded marriages. In the meantime, surviving infidelity has become a basic survival mechanism for others!

Partners commit adultery for a variety of reasons. Unfortunately, "variety" as the spice of life is one reason in itself for having an affair.

It appears that infidelity tends to increase when children are born. Perhaps there's not enough time spent together, or one of the spouses feels ignored.

Some cheat because they have an overwhelming sex drive or may be "sex addicts" with a compulsive need for sex outside their marriage.

Others cheat because they're no longer attracted to their spouse. Over time, they view their spouse more as a friend/companion and stay married only for the "family." Outside of their marriage they seek and find their greatest sexual fulfillment.

Surviving Infidelity and Loneliness

In any scenario, it leaves the one cheated upon feeling hurt while surviving infidelity - usually on their own. Even when their spouse wants to make things better and attempts to restore the marriage, the infidelity creates an overwhelming and pervading sense of loneliness. They say that "no man is an island." Try telling that to someone surviving infidelity.

Their world feels like it's crashing in on them. Most feel and believe this is the end of their relationship - or at least it's the end of it as they've known it. All of the years of dedication, commitment, trust, and love they've invested in their relationship get crushed under the weight of adultery.

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Surviving Infidelity -
Can Your Relationship be Saved?

Can the pain be undone … and your relationship be saved? When people are in their darkest, bleakest moments, all of their hope may sometimes seem lost. Some believe the damage to be irreparable - that the one betrayed can't get their mind past what's been done. Surviving infidelity becomes a continual thought process which erodes confidence deeply to its core. When someone is having an affair on you, it can be so devastating that you may even blame yourself.

But if there's love for your cheating spouse, then there's always the seed of hope. It will never be easy to forget what's happened to you but forgiveness is completely possible. The affair might be the "catalyst" to redefine your marriage. And this trauma can indeed lead to a stronger bond between you.

Surviving Infidelity -
Get Help from a Relationship Coach

The most difficult part about surviving infidelity is not getting caught up in finger-pointing and blaming. Instead, the couple really needs to talk things out in a productive, caring manner. Sometimes this is best aided with the help of a counselor or relationship coach. Relationship coaches are skilled at taking situations which appear negative and pulling out the positives which can create new and stronger relationships.

Surviving infidelity doesn't have to go on forever when you actively try to mend the marriage and mend yourself. Instead of just "surviving infidelity" and feeling like a victim, view yourself and your marriage as having the potential for becoming stronger after your mate has had an affair. A little relationship coaching can go a long way toward making this happen for you.

Get Help Today if Your Partner is Having an Affair

Talk to a Relationship Coach about Surviving Infidelity

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